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i should've started doing this years ago.
i am experiencing a revolution.
like in the 60's, but more inner turmoil.
anyway.....
(i can feel you all around me....)
there are innumerable possibilities.
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he says i look like a fairy.
tee-hee.
:D
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i do not know how to be perfect anymore.
i am being myself?
or at least experiencing life.
i'm sorry.
i'll try to be good.
(or not. it's fun to be me.)
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i love...
my family, who tells corny jokes and keeps the alcohol in the closet.
my boyfriend, who tells me when something is wrong and cries with me and calls me his princess and lets me be independent but lets me know he's there.
christmas, when nothing is normal but everything makes sense.
i don't know how i got here, but i am HAPPY.
*smile*
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i am unwilling.
unwilling to write this paper
unwilling to do anything but lie back in bed and savor the soreness that creeps into my tired muscles and bones. the labors of love are anything but exhilarating on the morning after.
unwilling to admit that i love this new boy, and that the previous boy is so much scattered memories.
that was the best birthday i've ever celebrated with someone.
he makes me smile.
the smoke makes me laugh.
the music makes me grin.
in this instance, i am happy, if unwilling.
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